Trial Run

The night before my shower, Nick, Colleen (mother-in-law), and I were headed out to dinner with Nick's cousin and boyfriend. It had been a LONG day at work and I had been having what I thought were braxton hicks contractions all day, so we were going to just do a quick meal and then head home. Literally right before we walk out the door I stop to go pee, and realize that I'm spotting ever so slightly. I immediately holler at Nick (and do the obligatory "Look!" Again, pregnancy really is throwing the mystery and romance out of this marriage...) and ask him to grab my phone so I can give Celia a call. I leave her a message letting her know what's going on, and then we decide to take off for dinner. We're still in the car when Celia calls back, and in her wonderful, calm, accent-y sort of way, she reassures me that, "Everything is fine, Eggmund is fine, you are fine, and all is well....Now call the midwife immediately and I'll be at your house in five minutes.". Cough. Sputter. Ack. I (of course) start crying, call the midwife (who tells me to go straight to labor and delivery), and then apologize profusely to my sweet MIL for ruining the evening. We drop Colleen off for dinner so she can still enjoy time with her neice, and Nick and I heads to L&R to meet up with Celia and get checked out. They hook me up to a fetal monitor as well as a contraction monitor and just watch for a while, and it turns out I was having pretty regular contractions (every 2-4 minutes). They ended up giving me a few doses of meds to stop the contractions and help me get a little more comfortable, and diagnose me with a yeast infection (which was the culprit for the spotting). After a few hours they sent us on our merry way, which involved a quick stop for a Wendy's frosty before heading home.

Lessons I learned from this experience:

1. Listen to Celia when she tells you to go in and get checked out with the midwives when you mention you "think you might be getting a yeast infection" but then you "think it suddenly cleared up on its own". Yeah, going in and getting it checked out during regular midwife business hours probably would have been easier. But where's the excitement in that, I ask ya?

2. That old lesson your mom taught you about always wearing good underwears cause you never know when you're going to be in a wreck? Yeah, that applies during pregnancy too. They told us to go straight to L&D without stopping by home first, which meant I was in the open backed hospital gown wearing blue panties with a rubber ducky on the front and "YOU QUACK ME UP" printed across the arse. And if you think Nick and Celia let that slide without mentioning it to everyone, you are severely out of touch with my 'labor support team'.

3. Stay hydrated at all times. Because a) dehydration definitely adds to your contractions and b) everyone on previously mentioned 'support team' somehow gains free license to look in your pee cup and pass judgment on your urine color/hydration levels once you enter the hospital.

4. There are slits in the hospital gowns at exactly boobie level. But they are only on one side (right). And while you sit there trying to figure out why there is a slit in only one side (meaning only one boob keeps popping out), your loving doula will come over to try to investigate this mystery by peering down the hole and staring at your nipples. Results: hole is for EKG leads, and Celia and I have reached a whole new level of familiarity.

5. Nick and Celia only need the time it takes me to go pee to come up with a combined set of new "rules" for me to follow (they call them "rules", I call them "edicts". Where's the democracy here, people?!?) After my potty trips, I came out to 1. no more working out 2. leaving work by 3:00 every day (which, after one more bathroom trip, somehow morphed into leaving work by 2:00 every day.) These two are not to be left alone to discuss my pregnancy. They are both stubborn, hard-headed, and unaffected by my charms of persuasion. Nielly no likey.

Pregnancy Brain...

...Leads to disjointed thought process. Though to make it sound purposeful and literary, let us instead title this post "Stream of Consciousness". Proceed.

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My mom threw me a baby shower and it was grand. We got spoiled, no two ways about it. I think we are ready for this little Eggmund to make his Eggtastic debut...

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My swollen ankles have taken on a life of their own. Just to boost the attractability levels, only righty really swells up, so I'm left with one elephant leg and one normal leg. Chew on that visual, why don't ya.

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I need to stop buying baby clothes. I swear the addiction is getting worse the closer we get.

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I really love my hubby. He's taken such good care of me this pregnancy (which, in his mind, means giving me lots and lots and lots of lectures about eating and resting). I think his fears about being a dad have now morphed into total excitement...He told me the other day that he "just can't wait" for Eggmund to get here. We got him a front carrier to sling Egg-baby around in - there was a lot of trying-on, strap adjustments, color consideration, etc. that went into this purchase. It's hanging in our downstairs closet all ready for the big debut. That Nicholas is going to be one amazing daddy...


I hope Eggmund can look this studly in his new hat.

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I miss working out. Isn't that sick? I'm really sad that I can't bust a gut in the gym anymore (I'm on probation from gym rat status via Nick and Celia's conjoined bossiness). I hope that I'm able to kick my butt back into gear quickly after Eggmund arrives...

*****
One of my 1st grade students at work (who is 3" tall and weighs 78lbs) snuck out of his bedroom at 3am and ate an entire sheet cake him and his parents had baked the night before for his mom's birthday. His dad grounded him from snacks for the rest of the day (a BIG DEAL in this kiddo's life), and gave him quite the stern talking-to, so this student came in very dejected and remorseful. He also felt the need to confess his sin to everyone he saw - including, but not limited to, the front office secretary, the occupational therapist, random parents walking around the halls, and the school janitor. When he told Mr. Jim the janitor that he had "eated mama's cake" Mr. Jim asked him if it was at least good. My student got big tears in his eyes and looked up and said, "Yeah, Mister Jim, it was weal good."

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My dog loves all the new baby toys. Nick and I love teasing her with all the baby toys by burying her in them and then making her "LEAVE IT!" It's a fun game, enjoyed by all.

Yes, that is the cat in the moses basket in the corner of the background.



If I can't eat them, maybe I'll just smell them.



Poor, poor Sheeba.

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Look, a balloon artist made me a pregnant dog! See its little balloon embryo in there? Sadly after a few days the middle shrunk down and it looked like some horrible ectopic balloon pregnancy.



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I think Nick is nesting. (Guys can nest too, right?) He went on a bender today and decided he needed to steam clean all the carpets, including the stairs. Hey, whatever makes the boy feel prepared for fatherhood, right?!

36 Weeks

How far along? 36 weeks!
-How big is baby? 6 pounds and 18.5 inches long (that there's a whole lotta baybee!)
-Weight gain? Barking down the 30lbs tree at this point. Le sigh.
-Maternity clothes? I'm happy now if maternity clothes fit. Nick's side of the closet is getting more and more of my attention lately...
-Stretchies? Shhhhh, I've come so far...Let's not piss of the Gods of Stretch Marks by saying anything...
-Sleep? If tired counts, then yes, all the time. Actual, good ol' fashioned, restful sleep is a distant memory, though :(
-Movement? Still a crazy man in there. Now I can see little feet and hands bashing through my poor sides. Last night Nick and Eggmund got into a little battle...Nick would poke my belly and Eggmund would go NUTS rolling around in response. It was serious alien-esque sort of stomach rolling. Also, hiccups. Lots, and lots, and lots, and lots of hiccups...
-Food cravings? Wendy's Chocolate Frosty's. (Makes me think of my mom..."Wanna go 'shopping'?"
-Gender? Hopefully he's still got a set!
-Belly button in or out? The belly button is either flat or out, depending on Eggmund's placement. Nick was trying to poke it back in for me last night, but it never stayed shallow more than 30 seconds or so. Guess the turkey's done!
-What I miss? Having energy. Putting on my shoes without seeing stars. Working out. Being able to see my jayjay. Having identifiable ankles. Cold cut sammies.
- Milestones?  We are full term! Such a huge sigh of relief to know that no matter when Eggmund shows up from here on out he should be a-okay to go!

Hospital Tour

We went and toured the birthing unit at PVH (Poudre Valley Hospital) where little Eggmund will be making his debut in 5(!!!) short weeks. Here's the mini-recap:

The Good
1. Really liked the birthing suites - they're spacious, comfortable, and have all the necessary equipment for mom, baby, and coaches right there in the room.
2. PVH has a lot of policies that support things that Nick and I like: keeping baby with mom at all times (barring medical issues or a specific request from mom for a 'nursery break'); support and education for post-partum lactation consultation, car seat checks, etc; all testing, paperwork, and general baby handling is able to be done bedside to minimize seperation between baby and family; access to things like intermittent monitoring and non-medicinal labor supports (such as jacuzzi tub, birthing balls, heating pads, etc.) to encourage a variety of pushing/labor styles and positions.
3. On the birthing unit there's a 1:1 ratio of patient to nurse, so you have your own private nurse with you throughout the process. When you move to the post-natal care unit the ratio only rises to 2:1, which means you (and baby!) continue to have a high level of monitoring and support.
4. Everything is kept to one floor - labor/delivery rooms, recovery rooms, nursery, NICU, operating suites, etc.

The Bad
1. Had a brief tour of the NICU, which gave Nick and I a mean case of the sorries. I'm thankful that PVH has a truly top notch NICU available, because if (god forbid) we were to need it, we obviously would want the best care possible for Eggmund. But watching a young couple scrub up to go in and visit their child just broke my heart...

The Ugly
1. As we went downstairs to complete some pre-registration paperwork, we stumbled across a PVH patient yammering away on her cell phone in the middle of the waiting room. This lady was (approximately) 4'11", (approximately) 280lbs, and (approximately) wearing a scrap of fraying fabric that may in some circles be considered a 'nightie'. One thing that wasn't "approximated" was her distinct lack of panties and/or bra-like undergarments. As well as a distinct lack of "lady-like sitting style". Poor Nicholas - it was like some horrific train wreck that neither of us could peel our eyes away from. Wow-ee. Definitely gave Nick and I a good giggle...We'll be laughing about the patient and her underwears situation (or, more specifically, lack thereof) for some time to come! Hopefully my lady bits don't look like THAT by the end of this little experience...(makes it a little less funny when you think about it like that.)

Birth Class

So last weekend we attended our birthing class, which ended up being pretty darn good. We took the "fast track", so it was only Saturday and Sunday, for about 4 hours each day. They covered a lot of great information, and gave Nick and I a ton of things to talk about in deciding what we want and hope for with our son's delivery. Here's some of the highlights of what we came up with:

- I'm going to try (TRY) going au natural for labor. With the additional issues around my pump and catheters, an epidural unquestionably carries some extra risks for us, so if there's a way to avoid it, that's what we're hoping to do. (And by "we" I mean "I" - Nick is totally supportive of whatever I decide. And if he wasn't, I'd rip his sweet little face off because MY BODY MY CHOICE A-HOLE. Sorry, that's the pregnancy hormones talking...) I've been doing a lot of reading about natural birth (thanks to my wonderful sis-in-law who sent me a great book about natural labor/delivery - she's birthed FOUR babies the good ol' fashioned med-free way, so she's been a wonderful connection to talk to) and am just generally trying to build my confidence around my body's ability to do this. My biggest fear is issues with my back and back labor arising, as this could create a totally different situation, but we'll just plan on taking those things as they come...

- Nick wants to catch Eggmund. We've gone from him wanting to see nothing, have the baby cleaned off before touching him, and (at most) cutting to cord, to catcher's mitt territory! (Though for the record I did tell him that if I saw him anywhere near my jayjay during the birth holding a baseball mitt of any type he would be kindly asked to leave the room. If you'll remember his birth plan list, I honestly wouldn't put it past him...) The midwives we're using are great about this kind of "Daddy involvement", and explained to us at our appointment on Wednesday that they would help Nick guide baby's head/shoulders out, and then let him deliver the body on his own and place Eggmund on my chest. It gives me goosebumps to think that Nick will be the very first person to ever touch our son, and will be the one to place him onto my chest. After getting to have the experience myself of growing Eggy these past nine months and getting to feel him move and kick and grow, I think it will be such a special experience for Nick to have to be the one to bring Eggmund into the world (though he may not be able to actually see what he's doing with the flood of tears that is sure to be occuring).

- We've added a few things to our birth plan, including:
1. Laboring in my own clothes (sounds SO much more comfortable than wearing one of those god awful, arse-flashing gowns with the huge slits cut into the boobie section.)
2. Using self-directed pushing (versus the old school, chin to chest and bear down for 10 when the doctor tells you to, self-directed pushing allows me to push when I feel the urge, for however long my body naturally tells me to push for. Obviously if you start to be ineffectual the doc steps in to guide you, but I like the idea of letting my body tell me what to do...)
3. Skipping the eye ointment and hep. B shot for Eggmund post-birth (fairly confident that Nick and I are both hep. B free...Our needle using drug days are long behind us now.)
4. Allowing for natural tearing (no episiotomy.) I know, don't you just naturally do a keigel reading that?!
5. Being allowed to explore different positions for labor as well as pushing/birth.
6. Waiting until the cord stops beating before cutting. (Allows for additional red blood cells for Eggmund, which recent studies have shown can decrease the risk for jaundice. Not completely proven, but there's no harm in waiting the extra 60-90 seconds it takes for the pulsing to stop.)

- We also got some nice ideas around relaxation, massage, and partner support during the birth class, and I think Nick feels a lot more confident in his role as a support person. I know he'll be great during labor (and if he's not, Celia's there to slap him into shape anyway). Plus he's already told me that if he needs to rub my back for 24 hours straight that's what he'll do, and I'll be damn sure to hold him to that.

Next up is our tour of the birthing unit at the hospital this weekend to see where I'm going to be pushing this little man out. The weekend after that is the baby shower my mom's putting on, and once we hit the weekend after THAT I've only got 4 weeks left! Holy moly...

I'm off to go put up my tree trunks ankles.

Baby Shower

Had my first baby shower at school last week put on by my amazing para's/bitches! They did an incredble job, and despite the fact that being the center of attention in that capacity is a little slice of hell for me (cue awkward comments and jokes from Niel because she doesn't know what else to do/say! Soft shoe routine! Give 'em the jazz hands! Big finish! Big finish!), it really was a nice time. We got SO much of what we needed - I can't say enough about the generosity of the staff I work with. We got (drumroll please...):

Thank you Jesus, because this bad boy was NOT in the Smosna budget!

I love Willow Tree statues, and this looks beautiful in the baby room right next to a framed picture of Eggmund back in his Eggy days!

Space saver high chair - Lourve it.

Tons of great (handmade!) baby blankets

Happy Baby Toys :)



Combo swing/bouncer seat (Our swing didn't come with the baby, though.)

My wonderful para's got us the swing, along with a baby wipes warmer (from Auntie Celia - Eggmund will have the happiest heiney on the block!), and bath gear from Auntie Deb and Auntie Cindy. How cute is this?

 Again, could I work with more wonderful ladies who spoil me (and my Eggmund!) completely rotten?!? I am too lucky....

My mama also got us our OWL QUILT!!! Yup, it looks adorable in the baby room. Honestly, how could you possibly go wrong with owls, anyway?

Nick was super excited about all the new 'gear', and decided that every single piece needed to be put together IMMEDIATELY. I must say, it was cute watching him put everything together. Still sinking in that in less than two months we'll be putting a little Eggmund into all of these new items...


 Anderson Cooper, the top choice newscast for Fathers Putting Together Baby Things.



Just needs an Eggmund!

Nick, looking disturbingly puzzled by the baby swing.

I need to remind him not to do this when Eggmund's in it...

Next up, highchair.

Hooray for baby travelin' systems!

Proud Daddy :)

We are so thankful for all the amazing gifts that everyone got us - I truly understand now when people say "it takes a village", because buying all the *&^% you need for a new baby equals something close to the GNP of many small African countries. Thank you, thank you, thank you to my wonderful ladies for giving Eggmund such a fantastic shower - Nick and I love and appreciate you all more than you will ever know!! I can't wait for Eggmund to meet all his incredible Aunties....